I remember back in the day when we had Michael Jackson on the show. He was young, black, and the only forewarning of his future freakishness was in his rider, which required we stock his dressing room with green Tic-Tacs and the members of Menudo. Back then my show didn't have the clout to kidnap Menudo and deliver them to Michael Jackson's dressing room, so I took a gamble and went out and grabbed 5 random Mexican kids off the street...although I think one of them may have been Puerto Rican. It worked. It turns out Michael couldn't tell the difference either, and he happily came out and debuted the moonwalk on my show (regardless of what you've heard, yes, the moonwalk debuted on MY show. The vast conspiracy to cover that up is the subject for another blog entry).
As for the 5 Mexican kids, they grew up to become George Lopez.
And as for Menudo, they're on the show next week! Against their will, yes, but what can I say. These days, The Shell Show DOES have the clout to kidnap Mexican boy bands. Well, the clout and the chloroform. Best. Bulk purchase. Ever.
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